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Old 03-05-2009, 11:13 AM   #1
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the ostrich story

bored at work thought i'd share a joke i just received.

The Ostrich story...

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.

The waitress asks them for their orders.

The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich,
'What's yours?'

'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40
Please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change
For payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A
Hamburger, fries and a coke.'
The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same.'

Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the

'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a
Salad,' says the man.

'Same,' says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.'

Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on
The table.

The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How
Do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every

'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and
Found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two
My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put
My hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.'

'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. 'Most people would ask for a million
Dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long
As you live!'
'That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact
Money is always there,' says the man.

The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?'

The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall
Chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say.'

P/s: Guys! Please be careful with what you wish for !!!

another one...

I urgently needed a few days off work, But I
knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that
maybe if I acted 'Crazy' Then he would tell me to take a
few days off. So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny
noises. My co-worker asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was
pretending to be a light bulb, So that the Boss might think I was
'Crazy'and give me a few days off.

A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and
asked, 'What in the name of good GOD are you doing?'
I told him I was a light bulb.
He said, 'You are clearly stressed out.'
Go home and recuperate for a couple of days.'
I jumped down and walked out of the office...
When my co-worker followed me, the Boss asked her,
"...And where do you think you're going?!"
(You're gonna love this....)

She said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark".
Life isn't about how many breaths you take, but the moments that takes your breath away.
Giving the government money and power is like giving a teenager whiskey and an M5.

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Old 03-05-2009, 12:26 PM   #2
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"They say ostrich has less fat, but you eat more of it!!!"
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Old 03-05-2009, 12:52 PM   #3
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... funny
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Old 03-05-2009, 02:15 PM   #4
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hah, those are cute.
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