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EMPOWERD 12-07-2004 01:36 AM

Street Racers Dictionary... (Woodbridge styles)
Street Racers Dictionary:
-Have you or someone you loved been Zapped lately?
-Have you been laughed at, at the street races, because you simply don't have enough?
-Well this small page has been put together to help people like you better understand the terminology used in today's ultra competitive street racing scene, go ahead learn the lingo, come prepared or don't come at all. Don't just Flap, ZAP!

Pumped: Most commonly used term to describe losing. ie." You got pumped"
Zapped: A most popular term used, meaning you lost; ie "You just got zapped"
Pajamas: If someone says" you just got handed your pajamas" you got beat so hard, you got beat like a rented mule, or a red headed step child. You got pumped taken home, then put in your pajama's. Your ready for bed.
Wood : Not made of metal; ie "your car is a piece of wood" meaning it is slow. "Your car is lumber" is acceptable also. "Your cars not even wood it's termites holding hands"
Sled : Meaning, so slow it should be brought out only in winter time "Park that fuking sled"
Toboggan : See, sled. "That 88 civic dx is worse than a sled its Santa's toboggan"
Brick : Makes your daddies '78 olds 98 look like a lightweight. ie Talon AWD or Supra. "Due where are you going with that 3200lb brick?"
Preperation H : Used to heal the burning sensation acquired from a good pumping "Dude, you better get the preperation H out, you got worked so hard you should collect a paycheck"
Bus lengths : When car lengths become too small we measure in bus lengths. "forget the car lengths he got zapped by 2 bus lengths"
Freight trained : Got pumped so hard it looked like you were standing still. "You got freight trained, ya punk, you weren't ready"
Pulls like a train : Used to describe a fast car, "4th gear, that turbo makes that car pulls like a fuking train"
The second gear smackdown : Passing your opponent when shifting into second gear, A quarter mile run won on the 1-2 shift.
Took a Beating : If you got pumped you "Took a beating, go rearange you panty drawer chump"
Sick pass : An excellent quarter mile run
Dirty : A sexy car, "Dude, SE-37's rims on that Civic look so dirty"
Park that pickle wagon : Pretty self explanatory. If someone says this to you they obviously don't think you have enough "Get that heap outta my face sister, go Park your pickle wagon"
Horse and carriage : Term used to describe slow car, "Dude, that things so slow, you should charge admission to ride in that horse and carriage"
Blizzaks : A snow tire, Poor mans slicks "Dude the blizzaks just ain't hooking up today"
Hockey pucks : Tires with no traction, usually old tires, after they've hardened, enabling any 30 hp car to "Spark a rim", "Dude, where am I going, the cars got hockey pucks on it, I'm not ready, dude"
The Frankie 4-ways : Used when passing your opponent, during a drag race. Not only does it add insult to injury but bystanders can clearly see the winner. "Dude I gave him the 4-ways by the end of 2nd."
You don't have enough : Used to describe your opponent, when you feel his wood is incapable of beating you. "Dude you don't have enough, park that piece of lumber"
Not ready : Self explanatory, ie: "So kid, you wanna race me? you've been saving up all summer to build your turbo honda? You have what now? about 80- 90 hp? your not ready."
Fuk all : Don't have enough, see not ready, ie : "Dude, you got two thirds of fukall, do the math."
Spark a rim : When trying to remove your tires while doing a burnout. When the rubber is gone and rims contacts asphalt, also could be followed by spark a rotor, if you have enough. "I'm getting new tires tommorow lets Spark a rim"
Bump stop racing : A car equipped with springs so badly cut the car rides on the bumpstops. "Dude, your cars so slammed, your bumpstop racing"
Lick your lips : The first signs of being envious of someons ride "you like my new car huh? lick your lips, slut."
This guy can cook : Smack Talker, Excellent street racing trash talker, has excellent knowledge of all of the terms listed on this page "he can cook with the best of them"
Lip flapper : Someone who talks the talk but never backs it up. see Shooter "Stop making noise, lip flapper, I pumped your doors last week"
Racing your lips : talking too much, "dude, you wanna race? you really wanna race? why don't you race those lips up and down my dick?"
Bench racer : Someone who has in theory built a 500 hp engine in their mind, and never brings it out. "You talk pure shit, go paint your toe nails Bench racer"
All flash no dash : similar to all show no go, except more up to date.
Italian tool box : The adjustable wrench, metric or standard!
Portuguese Tub : Running the wrong offset wheels on your car and then having to roll your fenders. Usually done with tin snips. "Dude my dad just tubbed my car, sick...Now I can run the 235 blizzaks" Now you can wash the roof of your car with ease.
Cook a tire : Warmin up the meats, or doing a burnout. "Dude that piece of wood mazda cant even cook a tire, someone get that guy some bleach"
Shooter : Someone who perpetrates a fraud claiming to have more than he has. (bring a shovel to wade through the bullshit)
Peasant : The guys who come to the race to watch, and not run his car. "I ain't gonna run here, too many peasants"
Pidgeon : The seagull's brother
The shaft : Something you recieved after you got pumped "Dude you got the shaft", some times followed by "he didn't even use vaseline"
Vaseline: With or without sand.
No shaft : Term Used to describe a rotary engine equipped vehicle. Something a rotary doesn't have; ie: explaining to a Gino what kind of camshaft you have in your rotary "Dude? What do you mean its got triangles and no camshaft? Bros, how can your little triangle engine run me if its got no shaft?"
Get The Bushel : After you've grenaded your pride and joy "get the bushel to pick up pieces and carry them home"
BAB or Bring a bushel racing : Name for a racing team that always blows up at the track, I will not name names, but it starts with an "A" and ends in a "spec"
Quit your blood clot cryin : Jamaican slang, excuses are not welcome at the races, If you don't have enough "quit your blood clot cryin"
Banging gears : True champions of the quarter mile; to not love your transmission, ie powershifting, or good shifting "dude that guys can bang a gear, but I bang his sister"
Alla 45 : Italian slang, for anything that is bent, crooked, not all there, out of shape, at 45 degrees. "Dude. your frame is bent alla 45"
Laying pipe : Something to do after a good night of zapping, usually with a member of the opposite sex. "I'm done racing, I have a date, gotta go lay pipe, with your mom"
tree-two-tree: refers to 88-89 Mazda 323 GTs and GTX AWDs - popular wit da Trini-Rude Boyz, usually in near showroom condition and full of 'nuff booty.
'Nuff Big Ups: If you get pumped by a dude in a tree-two-tree. "Dude, yo da bomb I give you 'nuff big ups"
Smackdown: If you got AWD and 60' that would snap most pencil-necks - you are dropping the hammer and laying the AWD smackdown to the pavement aka: All Grip No Slip.
All Grip No Slip: If you don't have AWD you get denied.
Double Booya: Pumped some chimp at the last lights and he wants another titleshot at the next intersection but gets punished yet again "Dude, park that wood you got the double-booya"
Title Shot: Racing vesus the local champ. "I am the man - you sluts want a titleshot?"
Wednesday Car: A car that is more reliable, solid and faster than most, usually built on a Wednesday when employees are least wasted. "Dude, Smackboyz Talon is a total Wednesday Car"
Net Nanny: A nerd who gets all his mis-information on performance/racing and busted parts from the Internet and gets them installed for $100. "Dude, take your list, seized turbo and your white Net Nanny ass up out of ma grill."
All Up in My Grill: Some trash-talking Gr.8 educated retard getting up in your face about how fast his shit is.
Stat Whore: Some chimp who goes on all day about how fast rides are when tested fresh from the factory, by magazines "Dude, LT1s are fast on paper but I have pumped dozens on da street with a 4*banger you little stat whore."
Tight: A nice looking car or a well built custom fabrication. "Dude, that 2001 WRX is yo mama"
Solid: A good perfomance when driving a car "Dude, that 11.9 pass was solid, bitch."
Bitch Beater: Cars used exclusively between Nov and May. Usually in disrepair, heavily rusted and 6 months or 20,000km between oil changes. Can be as pimp as an AWD Talon or as dry as a Suzuki Samurai.
Garage Sale: Unscheduled distribution of parts that used to be joined together, spread over a crash or explosion scene ususally followed by unnamed suspects emerging from the crowd to grab all they can carry. "Guy, you see that Wings West Civic smack the guard ****in garage sale"
Bukkake-Style: Rapid-machine-gun-style shifting action, usually followed by syncro replacements. Or multiple facials on Asian Girls.
Night Stalker: Rare brand of condom used exclusively by the Gees. Pregnancy risk is abnormally high but it has cool spikes on it. Cost is $1/unit from machines only. " Easy hooker, let me strap-on the Night Stalker..."
They ain't no TE37s: Fly rims "You have really nice ACE rims on your car but they ain't no Volk Racing TE37s"

Gianpaolo_E46 12-07-2004 02:17 AM

damn that was long, i can't believe i read it all, but it was funny as hell and for the most part true

paul christians 12-07-2004 07:53 PM

that is too much......

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